How To Feel Sexy After Having Kids

How to feel sexy after having kids, I feel like there is an elephant in the room now?. But Let’s go there anyway. I have always said that the one thing the church and the body of Christ needs to talk more about is- sex. I grew up thinking sex was taboo and shameful, but it’s a beautiful thing when done right. What happens is years later, you get married, and suddenly you’re supposed to turn into this sexual beast for your husband. Like what?! Add kids into this mix, and forget it all. I’m going to bed. MOMMAS NEEDS SLEEP.

Being a mother is hard, I know. I have four little humans, and I love them to ends of the world! Motherhood can sometimes drag the life out of you. Birth also changes your body in many ways; it does something to you. My body is not and will not ever be the same. BUT, it does not mean it can’t be better.

You can have 1 or 6 kids, feeling sexy after kids, is difficult. And I don’t claim to know it all or that I feel sexy every day. But one thing I have learned in my journey as a mother is that I can not pour into my family on an empty cup.

Before we get into a few practical tips on how to feel sexy after having kids, I want to address the biggest, and I think the most crucial thing in this journey.

Being a mom can take a toll on you, I get it. But it shouldn't be this way. Here are simple things you can do and How To Feel Sexy After Having Kids!

You can do all the things, buy all the lace underwear, and do all the self-care in the world, but if you do not change the inner, it will not matter. Again, you can get lip fillers, boob lift, botox, whatever it is- but if you don’t fix what’s on the inside, and learn to love yourself FIRST, where you are at NOW. Nothing will change.

Before you do anything else, you need to meet yourself where you are now. You don’t have to look a certain way or be a specific size to feel sexy. You can be sexy at a size 16 or a size 0. And if you do not see that, please, please speak to someone. Do not buy into the mainstream media (or anyone else) that tells you, you have look XYZ to feel sexy.

Learn to love your body and who you are in each season. The seasons will all look different. That grace that you give everyone else also needs to be given to your body.

Being a mom can take a toll on you, I get it. But it shouldn't be this way. Here are simple things you can do and How To Feel Sexy After Having Kids!

Now, what are some tangible things you can do and how to feel sexy after having kids?

First and foremost, make time for you.

I know you’re a mom, and time is limited. But if you do not take care of yourself, take time for JUST YOU, it will not look pretty. It doesn’t have to be an hour every day, but please, please take some time away and do something that fills you up! 

Move your body.

You don’t have to be an athlete or be fit. But exercise is good for you. It has so many benefits! Take a walk, go for a hike, do something!

Have a tribe.

Surround yourself with friends you can lean on. Friends who give you life and uplift your spirit. Have a support system, someone you can talk to. You do not, nor should you do life alone. You are not superwoman. “You can do anything, but not everything”.

Buy yourself something lacey.

AND MAKE SURE IT FITS! There is something about a beautiful lace bra. I have several, and anytime I wear them, it always gives me a little boost.

Get dressed.

I will not buy the whole “oh I don’t have time.” Getting out of your pj’s and into jeans, or a cute dress takes just as much effort. Now, of course, you don’t have to get dressed EVERY day. But try 3x a week. Also, make sure the clothes you do have fit properly. Nothing worse than having a closet full of clothes that don’t fit right. 


I would love to hear from you, how has motherhood made you feel, do you still feel sexy?! If so, do you have any tips to share?





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Elly, you look great! I love your outfit! ❤️✨

Charmaine Ng | Architecture & Lifestyle Blog

Ashton Jordan

I loved this! Everything you mentioned really hit home for me. Thank you.


I needed this! 7 weeks postpartum with baby #2 and feeling far from sexy. Definitely didn’t “bounce back” like I did with my first. Learning to love a new/changed body is hard, which brings guilt because this incredible body brought my children into the world. So thank you for sharing this! You rock!

KRistin McBride

I definitely have struggled with this. I’m turning 40 in six months and have had four children, the youngest is about 18 months. Getting back into shape after each pregnancy was HARD but so worth the effort. Working out is now my favorite part of the day. Also, putting makeup on some days, even if I’m not going ANYWHERE (hello, COVID quarantine…) makes a world of difference in my whole mood. So, thanks for these tips and I hope moms everywhere take your words to heart.

Melissa Janet

Obviously, the post is awesome. I am just turning into a mother. It really feels confident after seeing your comment 🙂 Thanks for sharing your experience. Will definitely keep it in mind.